In terms of relationships, friendship is by far the most underestimated.
People say that family are the most important when you are growing up. And hearts can only be broken in romantic relationships.
Friends are equally as important as family. They shape your life the same way famiy do, and are not to be underestimated. Family are who you are born to, but a bond as strong as blood holds friendships together.
And people always say to care more about your friends than boyfriends/girlfriends. But when you lose a friend you never get the support you need to deal with something so crippling. People seem to think that, in this regard, friendships arent nearly as important as romances. And that you should just 'get over it'.
Now, this is really biased from me, because I've had 'experiences' with friends, family and relationships.
I'm the black sheep of my family. And my extended family as well. They are all perfect, innocent christians who like their family to be perfect, innocent and christian... Or so it seems to me. And for a lot of my life I hid who I was, but lately I have finally decided to be myself. And I'm not perfect, I'm not innocent, and there's no way in hell I'm christian. At our latest family gathering I turned up wearing a shirt with a fiercesome dragon on it, listening to Nightwish, looking the image of a 'bad' person... At least to my family, I seemed bad...
I know I'm like this because my friends changed as well. I used to have decent, respectable friends in my parents eyes. They were pleasant, christian and seemed rather innocent. But a few months ago I started changing, and I ended up falling out with these friends. I hadn't realised that I had changed, and when they ditched me it really did break my heart. I did love them, maybe not in a romantic sense, but it was love. And it hurt when they just turned away. I had changed, but it was them who turned away. We had been friends for 5 years...
And they ditched me because I had been to a 'Mind Body Spirit' festival.
That was the last straw for me. I was giving up who I was for this image my family had of 'perfection' and I couldnt do
anything for me. Even the small things were too big. And so, I started changing properly. Being who I wanted to be, as opposed to who the world wanted me to be. And I fell out with many people due to this... A couple of people in my class offered for me to hang out with them. If my ego had intervened and my pride had kept me from going into their group (which, admittedly, me and my old friends had stereotyped as being 'rough' and 'bad') I would be completely different now.
I also rediscovered my best friend, someone whos always been in the background, always there when I needed him. His name is Sam, hes on this site, and honestly, I owe him my life. He kept me from becoming completely suicidal, and hes just there by my side. I love you so much Sam! I have also helped (i think it was helping anyway) to discover who he is. Hes now a member of this forum as well, another indigo...
RARO SAMWICH FOREVER!!!
Even with my new friends, boyfriend and Sam, who deserves a category all to himself, I still was having an identity crisis. I was so different than I used to be, and I wasn't sure which version was the 'real me'. I ended up calling up one of my old friends, Amanda, and yelling at her for ages... Telling her how much she hurt me, and we ended up being 'friends' again. At first I was really excited... But then, we were meant to meet up and she blew me off for some other friends from school... I realised that she wasnt changed, and she wasnt meant to be a part of my life anymore. It wasnt a mistake to ring her, because I was being eaten up inside by my unresolved emotions about her, but it was a mistake to try and repair the friendship. It would pull me apart the same way it did before. But I still kept our semi friendship going, because I still missed the way it used to be. However, 2 days ago I was walking down the road with some other friends and I saw Manda walking along... She was the image of superficiality, and she looked at us the same way I would have looked at my new friends, a mere 6 months ago. I knew what she was thinking, becasue they were the same thoughts that I have had. She thought of us as being beneath her...
Because of our semi-friendship, I talked to her for a bit, but it was akward... And when we turned our seperate ways, her walking off in the opposite direction to me, by herself, with all her 'proper' ways, me,walking off with people who I know seemed rough to her, and to my family, and to countless others, I knew that the latter is where I belong. At least, at this point in my life, it is. And its where I want to be. I am now over my identity crisis. I just needed to see the two contrasting aspects of my personality together.
Of course, now I have other relationship issues, but lets not go there, lol.
So really, the morals of my story are:
Always value the friend that sticks by your side the whole time, even if they do seem to be in the background (SAMMY!!!
)
Be true to yourself, don't be who you aren't
And don't judge people by the way the seem on the outside.
Just normal friendship morals,
Subject: Friendship 
Sat Jan 13, 2007 4:23 am
Ezack! 
